Modern-Day Gentleman: Where Can I Find One?

Previously, we explored what it takes to be a modern-day gentleman. But what does that mean to me, as I once again take on the dating world? Dating today has changed from the days of yore. To illustrate, ladies tend to go Dutch on dates instead of the men picking up the tab. We do this to show that we are also financially secure. But this doesn’t mean that ladies don’t prefer a gentleman: who is courteous and treats women with respect. It is not surprising that the term ‘gentleman’ has evolved too, as gender equality continues to improve the socioeconomic status of our modern-day society.

As dating etiquette needs to change with the times too, there are some dating etiquettes a modern-day gentleman should carry to keep their partner happy.
As dating etiquette needs to change with the times too, there are some dating etiquettes a modern-day gentleman should carry to keep their partner happy.
Image by Serhii Chernetskyi from Pixabay

A Proper Modern-Day Gentleman

I found Roy, my current boyfriend on Tinder. We both didn’t meet each other immediately. I had just gotten out from a bad relationship in March 2020. So, I didn’t want to get hurt again. I wanted to be sure of our relationship.

I wanted to date a modern-day gentleman. So I decide to make a list. A list of qualities that befits a gentleman in today’s modern society. But, I wasn’t sure what that would mean in today’s society? How will I determine what qualities a gentleman would possess.

Making a list of all the good and bad qualities a modern-day gentleman should have can help you decide a good partner.
Making a list of all the good qualities a modern-day gentleman should possess can help you identify a good partner.
Image by congerdesign from Pixabay

A Gentleman Always Treats You With Respect

So, I turned to the World Wide Web. I found many articles that helped me to understand the term gentleman. Eventually, my research gave a wider picture on how to spot a modern-day gentleman.

One interesting article that caught my attention was Up Close & Personal: Azrel Ismail from Gentleman’s Code Magazine. It shared about the Malaysian actor/model thoughts on being chivalrous.

This Malaysian actor and model who is well known as a man with warm personality, talks to Gentleman's Code Magazine about his thoughts on a modern-day gentleman.
This Malaysian actor and model, Azrel Ismail wore a double-breasted suit by LORD’s Tailor. He wore this beautiful outfit to the 30th Malaysia Film Festival on 30 March 2019.
Image from Gentleman’s Code Magazine

Moreover, Azrel explained how a gentleman should always treats his partner the best way he can. It doesn’t matter where or when. He will treat his partner with utmost respect.

For me, this also means that a gentleman should be consistent in his actions. This shows that this man is willing to put in the effort for you.

This is a quality that Roy possesses. Specifically, our days usually start with an exchange of ‘good morning’ text. And before retiring for the night he would send me a ‘good night’ text. Small yet consistent gestures mean a lot in a relationship.

A Modern-Day Gentleman Is Well-Dressed

The article on Azrel Ismail got me curious. I dug deeper into Gentleman’s Code Magazine to see what else I could find.

Dress well! But, you don’t have to be flashy. Invest in well-tailored clothes. Buy a good cologne. That’s all you need. Gentleman’s Code Magazine wrote it the best in Up Close & Personal: Henrik Birkeland.

You can wear an impeccable bespoke suit and have all the confidence in the world, but it will all fall short if you don’t treat the people around you the same way you want to be treated.

Henrik Birkeland, Norway’s most influential menswear, and a man with an expert knowledge of style
Nothing more attractive than a man in a well-fitted suit. It's help the man himself to bring out his confidence. A modern-day gentleman knows how to dress for every occasion.
Nothing more attractive than a man in a well-fitted suit. It helps the man himself to bring out his confidence. A modern-day gentleman knows how to dress for every occasion.
Image from Gentleman’s Code Magazine

Henrik explained how dressing well is good manners. He also talked about how to look your best in any occasion. Indeed, it helped me to understand why I find anyone who is well-dressed attractive.

Indeed, it was the confidence that they carried with them. That confidence showed me that these individuals respect themselves enough to make sure they look their best.

After reading such good articles, I wanted to learn more about the magazine itself. The Gentleman’s Code Magazine was founded in 2018. It’s a digital publication dedicated to the education and empowerment of gentlemen’s community.  The magazine is co-founded Bon Zainal Harun and Raja Noor Izzuddin. Obviously, they have dedicated a lot of efforts into making this a success.

Co-Founder And Chairman: Bon Zainal Harun

Bon Zainal Harun (Bon) is recognised for almost-singlehandly bringing back the pizazz into menswear in Malaysia. He reintroduced the art of dressing well to Malaysian men when he created his label, Bon Zainal Boutique in 1995.

Bon Zainal Harun is an image consultant, menwear designer and a fashionprenuer that many refer to. Did we also mention that he is the President of Bumiputra Designer Association (BDA)?
Bon Zainal Harun is an image consultant, menwear designer and a fashionprenuer that many refer to. Did we also mention that he is the President of Bumiputra Designer Association (BDA)?
Image from Gentleman’s Code Magazine

In addition, he has garnered notable recognitions and awards. Some of his more notable accomplishments include the Asia Top Leaders Award 2018, and STYLO Lifetime Achievement Award 2019.

Co-Founder And Editor-In-Chief: Raja Noor Izzuddin

Raja Noor Izzuddin (Raja)’s articles on Gentleman’s Code Magazine have given Malaysians a lot of exposure to the gentleman’s culture. Many consider him as one of Malaysia’s thought leaders in the gentleman’s philosophy.

Raja  is passionate in reintroducing the gentleman philosophy with modern-day twist that will suit well with current times.
Raja Noor Izzuddin is passionate in reintroducing the gentleman’s philosophy with modern-day twist that will suit well with current times.
Image from Gentleman’s Code Magazine

His editorship has helped the magazine win many awards. One such award would be STYLO Gentlemen Style Of The Year 2019. This shows they were on the right track in their efforts of reintroducing the gentleman’s culture.

But what motivated Raja?

He was disappointed that he couldn’t find any sort of journal or website that teaches men about the gentleman culture. So, he decided to do something about it. He co-founded Gentleman’s Code. It will promote the culture of refinement without focusing too much on the material and luxury aspects.

Thankfully, there are people like Raja and Bon out there working to keep the gentleman’s culture alive. There is still hope that I can find my perfect gentleman.

How To Be Modern-Day Gentleman?

I did learn a lot from the Gentleman’s Code Magazine. Also, the magazine has provided me a list of pointers to look for in a true gentleman. Fortunately, I see some of these qualities n Roy. He keeps his promises. He respects me for who I am. And yes, he also opens the door for me. I find him to be the perfect modern-day gentleman for me.

By opening my eyes to the many qualities of the modern-day gentleman, I am able to breathe easy knowing that I have made the right choice with Roy.

This the logo for the Gentleman's Code Magazine. An online publication to educate youth on how a modern-day gentleman acts and behaves.
This is the logo for the Gentleman’s Code Magazine. An online publication to educate youth on how a modern-day gentleman acts and behaves.
Image from Gentleman’s Code Magazine

Lastly, committing to be a gentleman is not easy. Perhaps this is a clarion call to change your mindset on what it takes to be a gentleman. The term ‘gentleman’ is attainable by anyone. Above all, Gentleman’s Code Magazine is available to assist you to become one. Please check them out. They provide an in-depth commentary for the modern-day gentleman.

Preveena SIVAKUMAR

About Preveena SIVAKUMAR

Engineer, teacher, and a published author, Preveena is one friendly and bubbly character. Travelled all over Asia in search of muse and inspiration for her writing. After all, the more you've experienced the world, the better the perspective of your stories will become.

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