Death: A Certainty That Nobody Wants To Talk About

Filial piety is the virtue of expressing love and respect for one’s elders. That’s one of the main pillars of the Asian values. As children, we had to learn how to carry polite conversations, especially with our elders. Even then, we have to be mindful to avoid certain topics too. Topics that are completely off limits, even considered taboo. Topics that we never discuss openly, especially in the presence of our elders. And on the top of that list, is death…

The Final Milestone Of One’s Life

There are many milestones in our lives, achievements to plot the progress of a life well-lived. First, we learn to walk, talk, read, write, and making our first friends. Next comes the physical growth spurt, exploring the world, doing well in exams, and graduation. Then comes the competitive stage. Landing our first jobs, climbing the career ladder, and securing our place in the society. After that, the accumulation stage. Buying our first cars, the accumulation of wealth and investments, etc. The next stage is all about settling down, starting a family, and continue to grow our wealth for our children. And after all that, retirement. Slowing down, and enjoying the golden years in our lives… Notice we all stop there, and almost never mention anything about our eventuality?… Our own death?…

Death is something to understand, not fear. Whether we like it or not, death is the final milestone in all our lives. So it makes sense to make the best of our finite time on earth. To live our lives to our fullest potential. And after we’ve achieved all that, we also have to plan our eventual exit from this world too.

Death And Funerary Expectations

It doesn’t matter what customs or religious practices we profess. There are always some kind of funeral practices that follow somebody’s death. And getting all that planned ahead of time will save us a lot of headache… Well, maybe not for us, but for the ones whom we leave behind. Like insurance, it’s always better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it… But unlike insurance, that works on the probability of untoward incidents happening to us, we’ll all die… eventually…

Remember when I said that Asian families shun from making funeral plans? That even merely mentioning it in passing is a taboo?… Well, when somebody actually dies (whether expected or not), that’s when chaos begins… How to handle the deceased? What to do about making the police report? Do you even need a police report? What about the wake arrangements? What funeral rites to observe? Coffin or casket? Burial or cremation? What about the final resting place? Or scatter the ashes? If so, where to scatter the ashes?

And don’t forget that the family members are emotionally vulnerable right now. They’ve just lost a loved one, and are not in their best mental state to make any important decisions. And that makes them vulnerable, an easy mark for the unscrupulous undertakers… Yes, they do exist… Just like the unscrupulous tow-truck operators who magically appear almost immediately after you crash your car…

Insurance Plan… For Death?…

No, I don’t mean a life policy… Not literally anyway… For insurance policies, we have trusted agents whom we can call on when we need help. Help for submitting the claims, navigating the legal paperwork, and perhaps be an intermediary between us and the authorities. Ideally, we could also have a trusted agent whom we can turn to, when we get emotionally vulnerable… You know, like when a loved one passes?… Somebody to help navigate the legal paperwork, and especially, making funeral arrangements. The family members of the newly departed aren’t exactly in the right frame of mind to make decisions. So every little guide and help goes a long way.

So, are there any reliable, one-stop service providers, that can fill this void?… When we’re emotionally weak, we become an easy mark for the unscrupulous undertakers… Well, I do know of one in Malaysia – Nirvana, a bereavement care service provider. I got to know them after having attended wakes and funerals, serviced by them, over the years. My personal experience with them?… Everything is professionally and respectfully done. Most importantly, they handle everything in-house. From the wake and memorial, to final resting places in cemeteries and columbarium, and everything else in between.

Yes, you can enquire directly with them, even purchase pre-need plans with them too. But dealing directly with a corporate entity isn’t exactly… comfortable… Especially for matters pertaining to death, and funeral arrangements. Fortunately, they operate somewhat similar to insurance companies. They also engage certified independent agents, who act as intermediaries between us and themselves.

Meet One Such Agent

Sharon Lee, of Zoyalee, is a District Service Director and a certified agent for Nirvana. She’s also a Certified Financial Planner and an independent insurance agent too. Hence, she’s a veteran when it comes to bridging her customers to the principals that she represent. So it makes sense to extend her repertoire to include funeral plans and arrangements too.

It’s only natural to want to protect ourselves from the circling vultures above, especially when something bad happens. But isn’t it better to plan ahead, and build that protection before something bad happens?… Especially when that “something” is as certain as death and taxes?… So if this describes you, get in touch with Sharon. No commitment necessary. Just have a chat with her over coffee… like I did… You’ll learn a whole lot from her in that one sitting… like I did…

So Have You Made Funeral Plans For Your Own… Death?…

Have you accepted the inevitability of your own death?… Or the death of your loved one?… Remember this, it’s much easier (for those you leave behind) to plan ahead, when you’re still mentally and financially capable. Planning for our own death is no longer a taboo. It’s just like having an insurance policy. Always better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it. There’s only one difference to this though… Death is inevitable… And whilst we’re at it, perhaps you might want to write your own obituary too… Nothing like hearing it directly from the horse’s mouth… even in death.